It would be a complete and total understatement to say that the transition back to America and back to school has been hard. It has been so incredibly difficult that there have been countless times that I have felt like I can't do it anymore - America, school, all of it. I've struggled with a slew of emotions, most of the time feeling overwhelmed which leads to me isolating myself, followed by anger because I know I shouldn't be isolating myself. But, its hard. Its really, really difficult. I think its safe to say that the transition back to American life has been tougher than the transition to India ever was. As a result, I have been moping and not trying very hard at anything. Yes, I know...not a good plan to make things turn around.
Today, I was sitting in my room, staring at the tapestry from India that hangs on my wall. I was thinking about the people I miss, the challenges I miss, and the joy that I felt while I was there. And in the background, my iPod had shuffled to "In Your Love" by Phil Wickham. He sings, "I have looked you in the eyes; I have seen the tears you've cried; I have heard you question why you are here...there's a reason, there's a plan; there's a God who understands; you've got your life inside His hands; have no fear, 'cause he says, 'In all your hurt and all your pain; I'll never leave, I won't forsake; you're my child and I'm your God; come and rest in my love." And, I was reminded that there's a plan. If I'm supposed to go back to India, the doors will open. But for now, I'm supposed to be right here, which means that I'm supposed to be a light wherever I am. Shining, I think, is sometimes a much more difficult task where there is comfort and where people know you and have always known you.
But, I have been reading The Hole in our Gospel by Richard Stearns and it has made me think about life and what my future holds as well as how I should be living each and every day. It has made me think of poverty alleviation and other forms of social injustice and what I can do to help. It reminds me of the society that I used to see and be immersed in. In the spirit of Martin Luther King Jr. day, I re-read (we had to read it in high school) his "Letter from Birmingham Jail," and new parts stuck out to me. I felt like I had been hit by a brick reading it because I could see it from a new perspective. King wrote, "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." Wow. He got it. On one hand, its incredibly disheartening because of the lack of social justice across the globe. But, King continues to say, "Oppressed people cannot remain oppressed forever. The urge for freedom will eventually come." That, if nothing else, is a source of hope amidst all of the world's brokenness. Someday, there will be freedom. Someday, there will be justice. For now, we each need to do our parts right where we are to aid in that process. That is our job. That is what we were created to do.
"Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility." -Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Isaiah 61.
Today, I was sitting in my room, staring at the tapestry from India that hangs on my wall. I was thinking about the people I miss, the challenges I miss, and the joy that I felt while I was there. And in the background, my iPod had shuffled to "In Your Love" by Phil Wickham. He sings, "I have looked you in the eyes; I have seen the tears you've cried; I have heard you question why you are here...there's a reason, there's a plan; there's a God who understands; you've got your life inside His hands; have no fear, 'cause he says, 'In all your hurt and all your pain; I'll never leave, I won't forsake; you're my child and I'm your God; come and rest in my love." And, I was reminded that there's a plan. If I'm supposed to go back to India, the doors will open. But for now, I'm supposed to be right here, which means that I'm supposed to be a light wherever I am. Shining, I think, is sometimes a much more difficult task where there is comfort and where people know you and have always known you.
But, I have been reading The Hole in our Gospel by Richard Stearns and it has made me think about life and what my future holds as well as how I should be living each and every day. It has made me think of poverty alleviation and other forms of social injustice and what I can do to help. It reminds me of the society that I used to see and be immersed in. In the spirit of Martin Luther King Jr. day, I re-read (we had to read it in high school) his "Letter from Birmingham Jail," and new parts stuck out to me. I felt like I had been hit by a brick reading it because I could see it from a new perspective. King wrote, "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." Wow. He got it. On one hand, its incredibly disheartening because of the lack of social justice across the globe. But, King continues to say, "Oppressed people cannot remain oppressed forever. The urge for freedom will eventually come." That, if nothing else, is a source of hope amidst all of the world's brokenness. Someday, there will be freedom. Someday, there will be justice. For now, we each need to do our parts right where we are to aid in that process. That is our job. That is what we were created to do.
"Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility." -Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Isaiah 61.
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